Women users of porn

I've been thinking of the way that much of radical feminist theory analyzes what happens when women look at porn, and wondering whether they're generally right or not. So, a question to women porn users in here: do you "identify" with a particular character when you use porn? And how and when do you use it?

In MacKinnon and Dworkin, for example, a woman who sees porn sees what she is "for," learns how men want to use her. In a lot of personal accounts I've read from women who don't like porn, a woman sees "what her man really wants." She finds herself thrust into competition with another woman, this one a too-perfect foil to heterosexual male desire. She's invariably found wanting, and this is a deeply stressful experience.

I see it assumed that even among women who like porn, the woman viewer "identifies" with the woman in heteroporn. (What about lesbian and faux lesbian porn?) But I wanted to question this -- personally, as a top, I tend to identify with the top, regardless of gender. Especially since the camera generally focuses on the bottom anyway. You tend much more often to see more glancey glimpses of the top (with occasional focus) -- which is vaguely, well, like what you see of your own body if you're doing it yourself! ;)

But I know I'm somewhat statistically odd in what I like, and also bisexual. So there's all of that.

And I'm sure that identifying with the bottom is equally complicated and interesting, particularly coming from women, who indeed aren't the target consumers of most porn. I'd love to hear about that. :)

And I also wanted to think a bit about the term "identify." I tend to put myself in the role of the top, yes, and imagine doing the same (or similar -- an image may help to shape but does not constrain my imagination) things to the bottom. But I'm not sure that's "identification." When you identify with someone, you understand them, take on their point of view, sympathize with their goals.

Sure I'm in a sense taking on that top's "point of view" -- I'm wanting to do what sie is doing. But I'm not really endorsing what that person endorses in a serious way. I have no idea who sie is. Or even who hir character is. It's not, in the average porno movie or set of digicam pictures, spelled out much at all who that character is supposed to be. Maybe some vague hints, and yes, maybe I'll think of being that character as I imagine the sex/BDSM/whatever I'm looking at.

But is that really "identification?" It seems to me "identification" with a character in, say, a novel, implies a lot of investment. If I identify with Harry Potter, I see some of myself in the character or some of the character in me. Yes, that's how it feels to lose loved ones so young. Yeah, I was a bit of a child celebrity and my friends weren't and it made things tense. Yeah, people expect me to do Big Important Shit and y'know, I feel a little like I'm seventeen and unready sometimes. Yeah, that one science teacher I had had it in for me, and hated kids. What a drag that was! Wow, I can really identify with this character.

I don't really have any conclusions to draw from any of this. But I did want to call attention to the complexity of all this and to ask other women: what DO you experience when you use porn, a medium which is supposedly not designed for you?

And heck -- men, go ahead and answer too if you like. I'd rather hear from women just because porn is so often assumed to be used by men, but I'm sure you've got interesting stories too. (Any of you ever "identify with" the people being penetrated? *grin*)